Minda's Message

I’ve been walking around for the last few months with voices in my head. Don’t tell anyone, but this is not necessarily unusual for me. What is unusual is how persistent and loud those voices have gotten recently. It started with the voices of those in the circle at All Fellows Gathering so eager and ready for connection. When members of the Class of 2011 stood up that first night to remember their classmate Sharon Elliott-Bynum who passed away earlier this year, the strength and authenticity of Sharon’s voice brought a lump to my throat and tears to my eyes. As others shared their stories of how they collaborated to create change in their communities, I began to imagine the impact of more voices telling these stories across the state. At the Social Justice Summit, Friday Fellows and youth leaders passionately and incisively shared their leadership voices in response to the question: “What’s really bothering you about education, criminal justice, immigration, LGBTQ and gender, and environmental policy?” Later, Fellows who are serving in public office spoke frankly of the reality of political polarization and their hopes and frustrations with creating meaningful civil discourse. On Sunday morning, Michelle Pearson led us through a visioning exercise where we started with “What is Good about the Friday Fellowship” and ended with “It will be better when?” I left that weekend with the needs, ideas, insights, and hopes Fellows expressed loud and clear in my head.

Next entered the voices of Fellows who called in after the election to process their thoughts and emotions with one another. We had three intimate, heartfelt conversations and you can read a summary here. The comment that I couldn’t shake was “We don’t know one another anymore.” For someone committed to improving human relations and whose professional work is to support, promote, facilitate and nurture leaders committed to the betterment of human relations, that statement landed hard with me. At first, I took it as an indictment. However, I’ve been working on reframing the narrative in my head, so I reframed it as a call to action, compelling me to immerse myself in the voices of those far wiser than me. I’ve read A LOT, but I want to mention just a few here because their voices resonated deeply with me and may with you, as well. Vincent Harding’s interview with Krista Tippett as well as his lengthy piece on “Is America Possible: A Letter to My Young Companions on the Journey of Hope” asks us to dream the possibilities for our nation, our world and our own lives. He asks, “To whom do we think America belongs? Who has the essential responsibility for its future?” and says, (bear with me, as I typed this out while listening), “What we’re really talking about is not how we can have a more civil conversation, but how we can learn how to have a democratic conversation. We are absolutely amateurs at this matter of building a democratic nation made up of many many peoples, of many kinds, from many connections and many convictions, and many experiences. How after all the pain we’ve caused each other, how to carry on democratic conversation that invites us to hear each other’s best arguments and best contributions to figure out how to put these things together to create a more perfect union.” (This reminded me of the TED radio hour’s podcast Democracy On Trial, totally worth listening to if you missed it.) Harding called for “a discipline” and “practices of exploring” how we can develop the best humanity, spirit, community, creating a multi-racial, multi-ethnic, multi-religious democratic society. This lead me directly to Parker Palmer’s “Healing the Heart of Democracy: The Courage to Create a Politics Worthy of the Human Spirit” and his Five Habits that make Democracy Possible. I know you all read “Let your life speak,” but if you haven’t read this book published in 2011, I can’t recommend it highly enough in respect to the work of creating the democratic community Harding asked us to imagine with him and what each of us can do towards that end. When I think about why the Fellowship was founded and what our work is in the current state of things, it is Palmer’s voice I hear. Finally, I took all these voices with me to Everyday Democracy’s Convening: The Moment is Now and all I can say is that they were IGNITED by the space that was created, the panelists, the participants, the entire experience. I came home with a renewed sense of purpose and ideas for how we might “get off the mountain and take this experience to the people,” as Lynette put it. I feel as if this Fellowship is part of something bigger than itself, a growing movement around the country grounded in our shared values and animated by a vision for the future where we are all free to be our best selves. As adaptive leaders, we know the reality of holding the paradox between what is and what ought to be with creativity, conviction, and compassion. We are well aware of how much work there is to do and how difficult that work is. Yet, knowing how many others are out there around the country striving to do what we are doing is, for me, both affirming and energizing.

Thanks to the hard work of the search committee, we will be hiring a new ED in early February. Not only will we launch a new class in the upcoming year, there will be new initiatives that give substance to the “support” and “convene” pieces of our mission. It is an exciting time for the Fellowship and I am grateful for all the voices that have contributed to us getting here- those serving on the board and on committees, those in our community of “un-like-minded” leaders, and those in my head, as well! I hope every one of you enjoys the rest of 2016, marking or celebrating in whatever way is significant and meaningful to you. For me, I’m glad to see this year end and I look forward to seeing you in 2017.

One last thought. As I wrote this, state legislators were calling a special session to introduce a slew of bills that the citizens of North Carolina have not been informed of, many which are designed to limit the power of our next governor. Protesters and a reporter were arrested. The gallery where they continue to debate the bills is now closed to the public. The Friday Fellowship has a vision for leadership throughout the state, at every level, to be courageous, collaborative, and civil, equitable and just, respects and engages differences, and makes thoughtful and transparent decisions. That many of our elected officials are not displaying this kind of leadership is disheartening. No, let me reframe that. It is a call to action. Wherever we can, whenever we can, may we all demonstrate by our actions what strong leadership looks like and raise our voices to let our leaders know that we expect them to do the same.

#MindasMessage